You might be a redneck 101

You might be a redneck if...
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More than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.
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You think the stock market has a fence around it.
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You think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.
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Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.
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Your front porch collapses and kills more than three dogs.
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Your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool.
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You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.
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You've ever used a toilet seat as a picture frame.
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Your home has more miles on it than your car.
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