The Alley Cat.
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Today's story is not a tale of fruit snacks, fashion disasters, or moments of Zen. It is about... My cat, "Cat"
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Before I begin my story today, let me give you a bit of background. My cat found me, and chose me to be his keeper. He came up to me out of an alleyway after work one night and climbed up my pant leg. I then of course, petted him. Sure, he was a nasty stray, but he was sure the sweetest one I'd ever met. He got into my car and after I'd put him out three separate times, I thought I was rid of the fur ball... until I backed out of my parking space and saw him staring at me in my rearview mirror, seated demurely in my daughters car seat.
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I turned around and let him know that he was welcome to join me, but that I lived on a military installment, and that he would have to obey my rules or it was back to the street with him. He seemed to nod in agreement.
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The next day, very much against his wills, I took Cat to the vet. His ears were swarming over with mites, he was emaciated, had worms, fleas, ticks, the whole nine. Thank goodness no heartworm, FIV, or Feline Leukemia. Yet all the same, the vet told me that he was also mentally retarded, and therefore a lost cause. Well, I couldn’t very well put him down miserably, so I told the vet I would take on the emotional and financial challenge. After all, everyone deserves a break now and then.
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Now, Cat has turned out to be the best pet I've ever owned over the past two years. He's really grown into a great family cat, despite his lacking mental capability.
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About a week ago, I was sitting on my couch, doing some submissions to a club photo gallery online. My glorious feline was seated next to me, bathing himself, as cats are apt to do.
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I looked down at him when his licking became audible and said "Do you mind, dear?" he looked up at me with a calm disregard and went back to his licking. As he worked his way down toward his "rear", he continued to curl his body over into a little ball, striking me in awe at his flexibility.... when it happened. Just as he leaned over to lick his bum... He curled a little too hard.
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And passed gas...
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In his own mouth.
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Ordinarily this may not strike me as quite so hilarious as disgusting, if it weren’t for the face... oh that face.
He glanced up at me with wide eyed surprise, with a look that said "wha- what on earth was that?"
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and then it changed to an "oh- oh Jeeez... oh what is tha--- OH GOD" As he stuck out his tongue and Scrunched up his face into something I could only describe as looking like a one year old who had just bitten into their first lemon wedge.
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Cat LAUNCHED himself from the couch, seemingly terrified by his own action, and I could hear him as he ran into the walls running down to the kitchen.
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He returned a good three to five minutes later, his face completely covered in water. It seemed as though he had run downstairs and dunked his head in the water dish trying to flush out his own gaseous flavor. A quick check downstairs confirmed my suspicion.
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Since this terrifying incident occurred, the fuzz ball has been taking particular care when bathing himself. He tends to sniff first, lick, jump backwards, and then go in for the actual bathing.
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Just another bit of amusement from the family that has never known the definition of ‘dull.’
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